109: A Beautiful Day

Wherein I discuss the Memorial for Ed, and life in general

“You can be loved by everyone,
And still not feel, not feel the love.
You can be told to not give up,
And still not hear a word from above…”

This lyric from the new Pearl Jam album echoed in my head all day long, I can’t stop humming the song. Because, it’s so true. Especially for Artists.

Something I didn’t really talk about in the newsletter, was when I made that video for Ed Piskor tribute in week 107, I had just hit the UPLOAD button and my phone rang, and it was news that my big sister had passed away.

She had been struggling with cancer for years and never told anyone. You see, my family isn’t very close… I’m from that classic American dysfunctional family tree. But I still cared, we still spoke occasionally. I used to be embarrassed to talk about being from a family like that, because it would upset the family members… that i’m from a broken home. The fact that my phone only rings from “family” when someone has died. I hate that the most. I hate the other end of those calls where the people say “oh we should have done this, we should have done that…”

But i know by talking about that a little, I know there are so many out there who can relate… because… we are all mirrors in some way. My problems or pains are NOT unique. I’m just not afraid to put myself out there. It’s the least I can do to let my fellow art friends know they’re not alone.

A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Last night in Pittsburgh was the bittersweet memorial for fallen cartoonist, our friend, Ed Piskor. I just want to say a little about it… and then I promise not to talk about it maybe ever again.

I woke yesterday morning with Ed and my Sister on my brain. Maybe a little feeling of anxiety, sadness creeping in again, or a sense of doom. Would I be able to hold my old emotional self together? “I Can’t be crying in front of people now!“ -

It’s just a lie I tell myself. I’m of that generation where our fathers told us not to cry… “suck it up, Coffman.” but they get older and then cry all the damn time at the drop of a hat.

But on that walk.. I quieted my mind, took some deep breaths and I heard a little voice inside say… “I wonder if the Pirates are playing today?” - Sure enough, they were.

Then I thought, what’s a better way to celebrate a life than to go get on with some LIVING. The next thing I saw was it was Record Store Day…

So I ramshackled a a perfect Pittsburgh day plan together…

• Record Store

• Pirates Game, then maybe a cocktail at The Warren.

• Ed Memorial at Phantom of the Attic.

• Hidden Harbor (tiki drink) for a nightcap on the way home.

And so, that’s what Ally and I did. And it was a good day.

I left all my work behind, I have a never-ending to-do list. This is why the newsletter is a bit late today…. but who’s counting?

I guess I am… it’s week 109 of the DRAW OR DIE Newsletter for my Art Friends….

Like I said in week 107, I don’t really want to dwell on DARK issues. It just so happens we have a skull and pencils as the logo… and it’s called DRAW OR DIE… but I think what i want anyone paying attention to take away is that… ART and being an artist is about LIVING…

On the good days, on the bad days. We gotta keep going and face it. I know it’s not easy. It’s not supposed to be.

You may not feel strong enough to get through it. And that’s when you need a community to support you. And I think that’s what we see in this community, in the discord, DMs, etc. We’ve helped so many and HONESTLY… I see the other members helping each other in the chats. Rooting each other on.

I know that’s making a difference that I can’t really SEE or feel sometimes. But I trust that it’s there.

What Doesn’t Kill You, Makes You Stronger…

The memorial itself was nice. It took place in Phantom of the Attic Comic Shop, Ed’s favorite comic shop. The family was there, we all toasted Ed with AQUA FINA bottles, (his drink of choice).

And it was so good to catch up with fellow creators from Pittsburgh I don’t get to see much anymore. There were a lot of laughs, some cries, and good stories.

Someone told me:
”I wish he could have known how many people love him and are here for him…”

And I thought about that lyric again…

you can be loved by everyone, but still not feel, feel the love.

I’ve gotten to seeing life a lot differently the past few years, through this lens of like… everything happening all at once. I told my old friend Jim Rugg something similar… it’s hard to put into words… but can you believe where we are now? This lifeline. These things that randomly happen in OUR STORIES that intertwine.

Jim said, when you’re younger you always ask yourself, how people going through tough times do it? And then now you’re in it. And you have no choice not to face it.

I added, even though we’re in our late 40s, we could have another 50 years or so if we stay lucky. Imagine all we’ve learned, what life can throw at you? Imagine how much more we can accomplish, especially when we know that we are now capable of managing pain and loss.

It doesn’t make any of the bad stuff easier. We just need to remember, what doesn’t kill YOU… makes YOU stronger.

I hope you have a great day.
I hope you draw something cool today.
I hope this song gets stuck in your head…

🔥This Week’s Drawing CHALLENGE!

This week’s drawing prompt is…Livin’ your BEST life.

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